Wheelchairs, arrrgh!

My new wheelchair arrived and some of the options I chose were not the best. My thinking was that the solid casters would be so nice, because I wouldn’t have to worry about airing them up so often. But, I did not realize that they would also make my main tires solid as well. My first thought after seeing it was ok, so that might be good because I don’t have to air any tires up.

This morning after arriving from work, I got into the wheelchair for a test. It worked flawless in our living room and turned so easily. Then later when going to the other room where there is a slight bump in the threshold, I realized that I could not go over the bump without a lot of effort and planning way before I got there and going very fast. That is not very practical to have to be doing that every time I go over a bump. So, that is one problem area. Another is the seat size. My cushion does not fit well. This new wheelchair is very narrow at 16 inches by 16 inches. I really need 17x18. Another problem, the armrests are too far back and short. I need longer ones.

I have to return this wheelchair and pick another one. This is not working out well.

I will pick another brand and have to spend several hundred dollars more and wait another few weeks for it to arrive while still riding around on my current wheelchair with the front caster problem.

I guess you learn from your mistakes but, arrrgh!

I was a bit frustrated and told Armando, Why do they make wheelchairs like that, with things that don’t work? He joked and said, Maybe… I don’t know, for someone that lives in a very flat house. I laughed and said, But it is not flat out in the world we live in.

Well, it is late or rather... early. I should head to bed. First I must take Cho-Cho to his bed. He is curled up and is asleep on my lap. He is becoming such a big cat. Cookie is also.

Hi again!

Sorry for the break in posts. Here is a quick update on what has happened around here.

As some of you know, Armando and I live in our little apartment, three rooms attached to my parent’s home. We have our own entrance but share a kitchen. Actually, this apartment was built wheelchair accessible for me before I met Armando but it works nicely for us right now as we face our new life together. It is our landing space before we get settled more permanently into our own home. These rooms originally were planned to have a kitchen but cost-wise and accessibility wise, the plan did not quite work out to make a kitchen in here too. So, that is why you often here of my parents in my conversations because they are in essence, our close neighbors!

My Dad’s two goats had four baby goats. We were all out in the pasture and Dad and Armando were building a warm goat house for the Moms and babes when we witnessed the birth of two of the babies. It was amazing to see it. I will share a picture of two of the babies at the end of this entry.

It has turned much colder outside and I’ve been wearing my boots. Boots are one of my favorite shoes to wear.

My wheelchair front tire (or caster) has broken causing a little apprehension about it breaking to the point of not being able to enjoy accessibility. It will be about 10 days or more before a new wheelchair arrives. Can you believe it was cheaper to buy a new wheelchair than replace all wheels on my current one? Silly.

Sunday Armando and I went out for sushi at our favorite restaurant. We had not done that in a long time. I tried sake for the first time. It had an “interesting” flavor. I sat there a few moments trying to figure out what it tasted like, if it was like anything I had tasted before. Nope! We also went to the bookstore and I bought a little book journal and My Antonia to read.

I was like a kid at Christmas because I got several book gifts this week. I love reading.

Armando bought me “The Morning of The Magicians”.

My sister sent me these books for my Birthday.

Junque Du Jour,

I will crochet another fish and post a picture here soon.

My sister is coming to visit on Friday and my little nephew Ryan. He is two years old. I am looking forward to the visit. My sister and I don’t get to spend much time together anymore except by telephone and email. So I plan to make a meal and we can catch up on each others lives.

I have to say bye for now and go make a quick supper before work.

Here are two of the new baby goats asleep.

Until soon!

15 year old life lessons

Before being placed in an acute care unit with coma patients, I had never been exposed to coma patients before. I was fifteen years old. I was there because I needed critical care and this was the only unit in the Rehabilitation hospital that provided critical care.

I have to admit at first I was very scared by everything. I cried a lot because I was young and just realizing that my situation was permanent and I was in a rehab hospital several hours away from my home and not allowed to have visitors at all for a few weeks. The hospital called it an “adjustment period” but it felt like punishment because I was used to my Mom visiting me every day and to be cut off from her and my family for a few weeks was very difficult and being in a new place surrounded by new people… I was so lonely and sad and scared. Of course I adjusted in time and realized that I had to work very hard to get out of this place and to get my life back. (I did not realize at the time that it would be two years I had to stay at that rehab hospital!)

In retrospect I think that was probably the best place for me to be at the time to adjust to being a newly paralyzed person because I saw people around me who had lost everything and I was so focused on them and their families that being a new paraplegic seemed minor in comparison.

You come into all kinds of situations in life and you learn from them. You learn that
you are really blessed every day that you can breathe and talk and express yourself.

Carlton

I remember when I saw him
For the very first time
His hair was golden like sunlight

He had chubby angelic cheeks
With a rounded little chin
He looked so perfect when he grinned

I remember seeing his family
They came to the hospital often to visit
The nurses said he was in a bad accident

Somehow he had fell into a pool
Something had gone wrong
Had been underwater too long

Had lost too much oxygen
It caused him to go into a coma
His brain was damaged then

I remember I was so sad for this family
I knew they must be heartbroken
To see their little angel looking perfect
Yet, unconscious and in coma

His sister was just a little girl
I would entertain her so her parents could visit their baby
I really tried to help the little girl be more relaxed

Later, I read books to little Carlton
They said it might be good for him
I don’t know if he heard me...
but there was always a chance

I wanted to make it all better, take away the unhappiness
It just seemed such a tragedy to see so much sadness
I would have fixed this with a solution if I had it

It was so sad the night little Carlton “coded”
The nurses rushed around and I was so distressed that night
He was just a baby and was not supposed to die

Sometimes life hands you hardest lessons in life
You have to learn to value each moment
Because tragedy can strike at any time

-----

There were other young children like Carlton.

There was Chris who came out of his coma but was never the same again. He called me on the telephone after returning home to Tennessee but all he could say was "hamburger, hamburger".

There was a little blonde haired child named Stacy. There was a little Canadian boy named Andrew. There was the young man who got shot... There was the girl with dark hair who I have forgotten her name but will always remember her face. There were so many young children in comas.

I won’t ever forget that time in my life. It was a turning point for me. I gained a lot of inner strength and I learned many life lessons that are still with me today. I met some wonderful people at that hospital that helped me including a doctor and physical therapist who are dear friends today.

-Michelle

Curve Balls and Such...

Sometimes life can take away your happy smile and make you forget all the beautiful things in the world and send your mood straight into the gutter! It can send ya things, oftentimes MANY things that you surely did not bargain for. Little situations that creep up on you before you are prepared for them or those little roadblocks that are waiting for you around the corner when you are feeling so “untouchable”.

I have often wondered what life would be like without life throwing all the little curve balls that it does. I mean, come on, let’s be honest with ourselves, do we REALLY need constant tests of our strength? Do you think you are stronger for having bypassed or overcame situations like that? I think I am. Do you wish they would stop coming so frequently? Sometimes I do. I have totally gone past the point of asking, why is this happening to me? Have I broke any mirrors lately or done something in to bring me so much bad karma? (laugh)

Actually, things happened so frequently at one period of my life and then set off a domino effect of “bad events” that I rather became used to bad things happening to me and I just got into this hunker down and brace mode. I was constantly ready to adapt to the next disaster. It took a lot of “learning”. You know, the kind of learning one only gets from going through bad stuff. The kind of learning that gives you silly little phrases to help you through like: No pain, No Gain! A winner never quits and a Quitter never wins! Grin and Bear it! You reap what you sow!

On the other hand, if I did not have frequent struggles, maybe I would think the next “big one” was coming and would totally screw my life up and that could be a weight I am unwilling to bear. I think when all is said and done, I grow stronger in adversity and the little battles I have won have made me who I am today and have gave me a sense of compassion for those facing struggles in their life.